


The Intervention

by Lindzzz



Series: The Evil Boyfriends Series [3]
Category: Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, Evil Boyfriends, Fluff, M/M, OH MAH GLOB DRAMA BOMB, Pitch is once again dramatic, and overly possessive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-12
Updated: 2013-01-14
Packaged: 2017-11-25 05:47:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/635741
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lindzzz/pseuds/Lindzzz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"In which the Guardians are concerned and Pitch almost kills EVERYONE."</p><p>Takes place about 50-70 years after Pitch and Jack first meet and quite a while before the first two installments.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Pitch stands by the skeletal bed that marks his home, staring silently into the pit.

Something is wrong. He can't say why, it's an itching under his skin, a gnawing feeling that's making the nightmares nostrils flare.

He ignores them and melts into the shadow. It’s a slow trip down through the winding tunnels and he runs over every surface trying to find the cause of his unease.  
It isn't until he reaches the main cavern that he figures it out.

The cages are hanging silently and not a sound echoes through the vast vaulted ceilings. The air is perfectly still. It hasn't been this completely and overwhelmingly quiet and calm since...

There's always at least a breeze here now. Even when Jack isn't here the wind is constantly playing through the labyrinth of bridges and walls because this is home. But the air is stifling and dead and if the wind isn’t even here then Jack isn’t just out.

He's gone.

One of the Nightmares snorts and Pitch sucks in a slow, steady breath, forcing down the clawing feeling rising up in his chest.

There's no REASON for Jack to leave, he reminds himself. Things have been....good. Very good actually.

It's been two years since the Tooth Palace. Two years since Jack slammed his staff down between them and told him No. Two years since Jack glared up at him with eyes like cracked ice and made Pitch really LOOK at him.

He hadn't been able to stop looking since. It was a year after that that looking stopped being enough and he finally grabbed Jack and kissed him hard enough to bruise. Held him and kept kissing him until the boy figured out that he was supposed to kiss Pitch back.

It was barely a week ago that Tooth had shown back up, having discovered that the little present Pitch had stolen for Jack was missing from her collection. It probably would have been a much shorter battle except Pitch had glanced up just in time to see Jack perched on the back of a Nightmare and whooping into the wind.

He had had to look twice because not only was Jack riding one of his Nightmares, but the Nightmare was actually allowing it.

And could anyone blame Pitch then, for stopping everything and calling Jack over? Jack, who then steered the creature towards him like he was BORN to it, like he was meant for this. No, no one could blame him for snatching HIS Jack down from HIS Nightmare and kissing every bit of breath from him right then and there for all to see. 

They ended up getting so distracted that Jack had to lob the little gilded box back at the bird to stop the swarm of shrieking tiny featherballs from pecking them as they flew back to the lair. It had been worth it for the look of pure shock and horror on Tooth’s face though. Pitch couldn’t stop laughing for the rest of the day and couldn’t keep himself from grabbing at Jack every five minutes. He may have technically lost that little skirmish but he had never felt so alive.

So, things had been good. So Jack shouldn’t be gone.

With that in mind he sends his Nightmares out with an order to scour every damned inch of his home. There has to be a sign, a hint, SOMETHING to tell him what’s happened. He follows his own path through the dark, keeping a hand along the wall to try and feel echoes of what the stone may have seen. Jack wouldn’t leave. There’s no reason for Jack to leave. Pitch was all he had! They believed in each other and he wouldn’t LEAVE.

His hand suddenly hits cold and slick and wet and he comes to a stop so quickly that he nearly stumbles. Ice. There’s a wide, halfhazard spatter of ice that’s only recently begun to drip. Jack is usually more controlled, painting fine lace in frost or carefully laying just a thin enough layer of ice to make things slippery. This is a thick, uneven blotch that looks like it was thrown suddenly against the wall. It’s the sort of sloppy work Jack tosses around only when he’s fighting. When he’s defending himself.  
Pitch hisses and the shadows become heavy and thick. Jack didn’t leave. Jack had been attacked. Jack had been STOLEN. Someone had come into his home and taken what belonged to HIM.

There’s a flash of color in the corner of his eye, a small bit of brightness in all the dark and gray. Pitch turns, hand slowly pulling away from the ice as he steps towards the spot of…pink?

He can hear the shrieking of the Nightmares as their burning eyes begin to circle him, sensing his agitation. The shadows drag with him and walls fade away, melting into blackness as all of his attention narrows onto a single, leafless flower sprouting up from the stone.

“The Guardians!” He spits the title like a curse, crushing the flower beneath his foot as he breathes deep, controlled breaths. The head Nightmare approaches him, snorting softly and he runs his hand along her neck, voice the dry rasping of leaves on a tombstone.

“So, they really are determined to take everything away from me, aren’t they?” He pulls himself onto the Nightmare’s back with a whisper of shadow and grips the reigns so hard that his knuckles creak. Without another word the cloud of Nightmares bursts forward, shrieking their master’s rage into the night. He doesn’t need to steer them, only thinks of the destination and their off in a mass of swirling black.

The Warren.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack is really tired of everyone's shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO! Some notes. There was a bit of confusion about timelines since I didn't describe the summary to well. This is a universe where the movie events never actually happen since Pitch found Jack when Jack was around 100. Sorry for anyone who was confused! But basic timeline so far is as follows 
> 
> -100 years after waking up, Jack meets a broken, ancient spirit of fear and the two form a weird sort of partnership. Pitch mainly sees him as a kind of pet for the first few decades and doesn't pay too much attention to him.
> 
> \- Around 50-70 (exact time isn't TOO big a deal with this series) years later, SOMETHING happens at the Tooth Palace that changes their whole dynamic. This is what Tooth and Jack are referring to and it's ok if you have no idea what they're talking about. The Tooth Palace Incident will be the next big installment after one short fluff drabble. But after this Incident, Pitch started seeing Jack differently.
> 
> -About a year later Pitch realized that he needed to just kiss that boy right on the mouth. And so he did.
> 
> -And a year later is when this fic is set. A lot of people were hoping for Jack giving the Guardians hell but at this point, he's still pretty young and new to everything (I mean at this point he's still got his colonial gear on). So he's mainly confused, but still manages to be a huge brat.
> 
> -The first two fics were closer to where the movie WOULD have happened.
> 
> Hope that clears things up for everyone! Sorry about the confusion!
> 
> Also this SHOULD have been updated last night, but the Tumblr crowd got me off track by demanding I tell them how the Evil Boyfriends boners work. I HOPE YOU'RE PROUD OF YOURSELVES TUMBLRS! YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

“Ow! Seriously what-!” Jack goes tumbling head first into a pile of flowers as the hole that had -suddenly opened under him what the HELL- closes again. He manages to push himself back into a sitting position just in time to see his staff carried off by a bunch of fairies.

“Hey! What!?” He yells after him as they flutter off. “You guys again!? You puffballs stopped being cute so long ago! Where am I?!”

Everything is green; it’s all light and green and warm and it’s all very pretty but he’d really rather be back in Pitch’s dank little hole in the ground.

There’s the sharp scrape of stone to his side and he looks up and there is a giant stone egg on legs and this is all officially too much for him. He scrambles backwards and yelps when his back hits damp, mossy wood.

“Easy mate easy! They’re not gonna hurt you. Just makin' sure you don’t go flyin' off too soon is all.”

Jack stares up at the….rabbit…it’s a giant rabbit. “What.” 

The rabbit smiles tentatively in a way that is probably supposed to be comforting. It’s really not.  
Jack frowns, thinking. “Wait…no…oh my God. You’re the Easter Bunny.” He’s starting to feel a little hysterical because NOTHING is making sense right now. “Why are you the Easter Bunny?! And why am I here?”

The rabbit, The Easter Bunny, stares at him, looking mildly horrified for some reason as he sucks a breath in through his teeth. “Crikey Tooth...you were right.”

Tooth? Tooth! He whips his head around at the sound of whistling wings as Toothiana flutters up to hover right behind the rabbits shoulder. She’s smiling, technically, but it’s tense and strained and her hands are clasped tightly in front of her.

“Hello again Jack, sorry about all this. I just thought we should have a little talk. And I never got a chance to...thank you for helping me.” She frowns, feathers ruffling briefly. “Even though you stopped helping pretty quick.”

Jack blinks, this is quickly becoming the official Weirdest Day of his Life.

“Wow. Ok. Hi there Bird. I’m not gonna lie, I really was hoping to not ever see you again?”

She fluffs up at that and there’s a flurry of enraged squeaking behind her from the small group of fairies that STILL have Jack’s staff. Tooth holds up a dainty hand and they go quiet, though it looks like several of them are seriously thinking of taking out Jack’s eyes. The rabbit is frowning now too, and WOW these people are tense.

Tooth clears her throat, feathers sleeking down again. “Jack, I know we’ve had our differences.” He snorts and she shoots him a look but continues. “But...we’re just...worried.”

“Kid what the hell are you doing hanging around Pitch Black for?” The rabbit interrupts. “And more importantly, how the hell did he convince you to let him stick his tongue down your throat?”

Both of them look a little ill at that and Jack feels his face turning pink. He’s going to have a TALK with Pitch about public displays of affection later if this is what happens.

“Ok ,so first of all,” he holds up a finger, scowling at the two idiots in front of him, “not a kid. Second of all, he didn’t talk me into anything, I joined him on my own. And THIRD of all that is none of your business, Cottontail!”  
“Name’s Bunnymund, kid,” Cottontail grits out, “and how old are you anyway?”

Jack puffs and scowls, “I don’t know? Something around a hundred and eighty? Close to two hundred!”

He isn’t sure why the overgrown hopper cares or what reaction he was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t for the rabbits ears to flatten back and his eyes to widen in horror. “Bloody HELL Pitch...” he mutters, looking again like he was about to be sick. Jack is just done with this. He’s sitting here being interrogated by a nosey bird and a cranky rabbit, there’s dew soaking into his pants and his staff is being held captive by a bunch of glaring squeakers.

He was not impressed by any of this. At all.

“Is there a point to this? I’d rather get back before Pitch figures out I’m gone, he’s kinda dramatic.” He ignores their flummoxed stares and continues, “And aren’t there supposed to be more of you?”

The rabbit looks like he’s still trying to figure out why Jack wants to go back but Tooth recovers first, still looking at him like he grew an extra head. “It’s close to Christmas I’m afraid and Sandy is always busy...we can’t all really gather unless it’s something that threatens everyone. But,” Her determined face returns and Jack really does not know why these idiots are so stubborn about this, “they both agree with what we’re doing!”

“So I’m stuck in an intervention with a spastic bird and cranky fur-ball is what you’re saying?”

That apparently snaps said fur-ball back into the present and he glowers at Jack, advancing menacingly, “Now listen here you little brat-”

Tooth quickly puts herself between them, frowning as she holds Cottontail back with one hand. “Jack, look, we’re just...concerned. You’re not a bad person! What you did for me at the Palace-”

“Woah now that was definitely NOT for you-”

“But it was for the KIDS, Jack!”

Jack glares at her, he doesn’t really want to talk about this and especially not with these guys. “I know Pitch isn’t the nicest guy ok! But he does what he’s MEANT to do! Yeah he gets some really stupid ideas but it’s all because he feels like he has to go all out or fade away into nothing! And you all should really be THANKING me instead of trying to talk me out of this! Do you even realize how many of his stupid ‘take over everything’ schemes I’ve had to derail! And that’s SINCE his little stunt at the Tooth Palace! Now seriously! Can I get back before he notices that I’m gone and this gets ten times more stupid than it already is?!”

The rabbit looks exasperated and GOOD because he’s not the only one. “Kid!” he yells, looking like he’s at his wits end, “I don’t know what the hell you think is going on with you two but Pitch Black does. not. care! That bastard doesn’t care about anything but his own ambitions! He’s using you kid! He doesn’t-”

It’s then that everything goes dark. It’s like someone suddenly blew the sun out. The air is heavy and filled with distant and growing whispers promising destruction and terror. Every feather and every hair on the two Guardians goes up on end as the hissing grows louder.

“Great” Jack groans, “now look what you’ve done.”

Areas of shadow thicken, coalescing into a roiling, towering storm of darkness. Jack can only pick out the Nightmares by their bright, brimstone eyes and he can just make out the silhouette of Pitch in the front of it all. His only discernible features are two burning, yellow eyes and rows of silver teeth bared in a snarl. That, and the long, deadly scythe clutched in his bony hand. 

The Guardians quickly move between the two, putting Jack behind them as they draw their weapons against the swarming mass and....what? Jack blinks. They are seriously moving to protect him and isn’t that just precious.

“You guys are really...dumb” he says, standing up and brushing bits of grass off his cloak.

“Look, kid,” Cottontail growls, “I’m pretty sure I don’t actually like you,”

“Names Jack, Cottontail.”

Cottontail grits his teeth and adjusts his grip on the boomerang like he’s seriously considering just wanging it over Jack’s head. “Alright, I know I don’t like you. But would you just shut up and-”

“ YOU'VE TAKEN WHAT’S MINE FOR THE LAST TIME RABBIT!”

Pitch’s voice is the crumbling of mountains and the screaming of dying worlds.

“Drama King” Jack mutters. In all the chaos he manages to dodge the eggs and Guardians and grab his staff, shaking off the squealing fairies. He sets his jaw and strides towards the mass of Nightmares, ignoring the yells of “KID!” and “Jack! No!” because he is just really tired of all the stupid that’s going around.

He finally reaches Pitch and crosses his arms, glaring up into the endless shadow. Pitch is so caught up in his little hissy fit that he doesn't even NOTICE the boy standing in front of him.

“I’LL RIP EVERY BIT OF YOUR PRECIOUS HOPE FROM THIS WORLD. THERE WON’T BE ANYTHING LEFT FOR YOU TO LIGHT WHEN I’M FINISHED. YOU GIVE ME BACK WHAT BELONGS TO ME NOW BEF-”

“Hey! Calm down! I’m fine!” There’s a pause, then a sudden rush as the shadows swoop in on Jack. There are hands running over his face and down his sides and through his hair as if making sure every bit of him is present and accounted for. Pitch’s face shifts back to it's normal glower while his eyes dart over Jack, checking for damage.

“Jack!” Thank GOD he’s talking normally now, Jack’s ears were starting to hurt. “What did they do to you?” Claws prick at Jacks skin as fingers dig into Jack’s shoulders and Pitch pulls him in, voice a dangerous hiss. “I’ll destroy them for this! I swear it! I’ll-”

“Hey! No need for that! Shoosh!” Jack puts a soothing hand on Pitch’s chest, half hoping that he can just force some reason into the guy by sheer force of will. “Stop that! I’m ok, we were just having a little chat alright? They’re just dumb and we don’t need to go destroying everything. They brought me here to have a little talk and it's not their fault that they're stupid and went about it stupidly. It's ok.” 

Pitch narrows his eyes and shoots a quick, deadly look up at the Guardians. But the shadows begin pulling back and light slowly leaks into the warren again as the Nightmares settle and reform. His fingers tighten into Jack’s shoulders again and reel him in, ignoring the indignant “oof!” as he clutches the boy to him.

Jack is somehow able to move his head so his face is completely crushed against Pitch’s chest and he manages a wheezed “I can’t breathe you big lug!”

He’s promptly ignored and rolls his eyes with a huff, allowing Pitch to squeeze every bit of life out of him. He has a feeling he’s not going to be allowed out of grabbing distance for at least a month. His fears are confirmed when a hand begins aggressively running through his hair as Pitch snarls at the shocked Guardians.

“If any of you even THINK about touching him again-”

“Yes, I’m sure they get it! You’ll flay them alive and ruin all their happy dreams and cover the world in darkness blah blah blah! Can we go home now? This day has just been an endless train of idiocy, INCLUDING YOU, and I am sick of it.”

Pitch quiets, though he lets out one last rumbling growl before he spits out a “Fine!” 

He yanks Jack in and both disappear in a whirling rush of shadow and Nightmares.

 

 

 

The warren is silent, both Tooth and Bunnymund staring wide eyed at the spot that was filled with raged shadows and one small, white haired boy.

Bunnymund is the first to recover and snaps his mouth shut with a click.

“What. The bloody hell. Just happened?!”

**Author's Note:**

> Shit just got real.
> 
> Note: The Beta and I spent way too much time making Gollum jokes while I was writing this. 
> 
> THEY STOLES HIM. THEY STOLES THE PRECIOUS. JACK IS LOOSSST. WE HATES THEM. STUPID FAT GUARDIANS.
> 
> EDIT: Forgot to mention! In celebration of hitting 100 followers I've temporarily turned my blog into "Ask The Evil Boyfriends!" Ask these two assholes anything you want! http://lin-d-z.tumblr.com/


End file.
